The Golden Poodle award goes to the surviving 9/11 rescue dogs. They are retired now and the good news is that a long-term study shows that they have not suffered the health problems that have plagued some of the human rescuers.
Possibly doctors can learn from them information to improve human health.
The Lizard Brain award goes to the California legislature for the law requiring breaks for baby sitters every two hours, among other demands, but ignoring the plight of dog sitters.
The Neanderthal award goes to the city of New York for enforcing laws against dogs in neighborhood bars, a tradition that goes back to the early 19th century.
No food is served, bar owners welcome the dogs, humans and dogs enjoy socializing, no one is forced to go into the bars, but the bureaucrats say no.
The award goes to them also for classifying gin, whiskey and vodka as food. Possibly they have been eating too many whiskey sandwiches.